love how merry and pippin just join sam and frodo. they just literally run into him after stealing vegetables, see some nazgul, and go “oh, sick. we’re in!” without, like, any preparation whatsoever. no going home and packing, no letting their family know they’re gonna be gone for an indeterminate amount of time. just them, their carrots, and a grand total of one brain cell. legends.
what is my perfect crime? i break into tiffany’s at midnight. do i go for the vault? no, i go for the chandelier. it’s priceless. as i’m taking it down, a woman catches me. she tells me to stop. it’s her father’s business. she’s tiffany. i say no. we make love all night. in the morning, the cops come and i escape in one of their uniforms. i tell her to meet me in mexico, but i go to canada. i don’t trust her. besides, i like the cold. thirty years later, i get a postcard. i have a son and he’s the chief of police. this is where the story gets interesting. i tell tiffany to meet me in paris by the trocadero. she’s been waiting for me all these years. she’s never taken another lover. i don’t care. i don’t show up. i go to berlin. that’s where i stashed the chandelier.
You are angry about something. “Clam down,” I text you. You assume I have made a typo, but in fact I am holding a small soldier clam in my hands. He died so young. War is hell
i want my baking to be so good that when someone eats it they either wonder why im not married or have a split-second panic abt proposing to me right then and there
